Catfish and Dogfish
by Alex-loves-her-Louie
Summary: Deidara, Tobi, and Catfish? one-shot, read if you want to find out!


I don't own Naruto! Why do you even ask, hu?

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**Catfish and Dogfish **

Deidara was walking and trying so, hard not to KILL Tobi! He just wouldn't shut-up! He was saying something about how he wanted to have a pet catfish, and that they must have clean fur because they live in the water.

Oh, how he wished he could kill him, but Leader would have a fit "it would also be a waste of Art".

Deidara was about to blow Tobi up when Tobi cried out in pain. Deidara spun around to see that Tobi had stumbled over a log, had his shoe off, and was holding his foot "Deidara was pleased at this".

"Tobi, what did you do now, un!" Deidara said a little louder then he meant to.

"Tobi was walking and he tripped. Now there is a mean splinter in Tobi's foot."

"Well, pull it out and let's go, yeah"

"But Deidara senpai, it hurts! Will you pull it out and make it all better"

Deidara sighed "If I do, will you leave me alone, un?"

Tobi bobbed his head up and down. Why did he have to have such and idiot for a partner? Sasori was made of wood; he wouldn't have cared if he had a splinter. He wouldn't even have gotten one! Deidara walked over to his partner and bent down. Tobi let go of his foot and Deidara pulled out the splinter. Tobi wiggled his toes.

"Tobi feels much better Deidara senpai, now that the mean splinter is out of Tobi's foot."

Deidara grunted and started to walk away. To his dismay, Tobi was by his side rambling on about how he couldn't have a catfish and a dogfish because the dogfish would bark at the catfish. Deidara managed to tune him out and focused on getting back to the supper cool, secret, evil base hidden behind a water fall "ha, ha, ha. It's not a secret anymore!" It was starting to get dark. Deidara and Tobi had made a camp in a small clearing in the woods. After Deidara freaked Tobi with ghost stories they both looked up at the stares.

"Well, I'm going to bed, un"

"Tobi will go to bed to"

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After Deidara was sleeping...

"Deidara senpai, wake-up, wake-up, wake-up! Tobi had a bad dream! Wake…" that's all Tobi could say before Deidara had tackled him to the ground. "Tobi, you ass! Don't ever, ever, ever wake me up because you had a nightmare, yeah!" Tobi squirmed out from under Deidara and ran franticly around the camp screaming "Tobi is a good boy Deidara senpai, good boy, gooooooood boy!"

Deidara sighed "Tobi sit down now, un!" Deidara yelled.

Tobi sat down in front of Deidara. "Ok, what did you dream about, yeah?" Deidara asked. "Tobi dreamed about the ghost story you tolleded him." Last time I do that, Deidara thought "or did he?"

"Deidara senpai, will you tell Tobi a happy story to make him go to sleep?"

Deidara was not going to pass and opportunity to get Tobi to shut-up, and if he had to tell a happy-fluffy-bunny story, then he was going to tell a happy-fluffy-bunny story.

"Alright, alright, I will tell you a story if you will go to sleep."

Tobi jumped up and down excitedly. "Thank you Deidara senpai! Tobi will be a good boy." Tobi exclaimed.

"Yeah, sure, un. Ok, what kind of story could I tell you, yeah?" Deidara said more to him self then to Tobi.

Deidara put his hand on his chin. "Ok, there once was a… catfish that lived in the ocean, yeah. One day he decided that he was going to swim up a stream to… find some… friend, because he was lonely. When he got up stream he found… a… dogfish, un. They became friends and went to the ocean where some fishermen caught and ate them for dinner, the end." Tobi just sat there with a bewilder look under his mask "yes, under his mask".

"Tobi thinks that was a sad story Deidara senpai, not a happy one!"

Deidara glared at Tobi "why wasn't it a happy story, un!"

"Everyone got's eaten by people"

"Oh, well, all the other fish got revenge on the fishermen and sent a shark to eat them, and Itachi, un."

"Why did the fishies try to eat Itachi Deidara senpai?"

"Because, no one likes Itachi, un, and they didn't try to eat him, they did eat him!"

"Tobi likes Itachi."

"What did you say Tobi. Did you say you like that blind freak, un?"

"But, Deidara senpai Itachi has black hair. You are the blonde one remembers?"

"TOBI, I said blind not blonde!!!" Deidara tackled Tobi to the ground "once again" Tobi jumped up and ran away from Deidara dogging bombs.

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After there little "incident", Deidara couldn't find Tobi.

"Tobi, you ass, get over here right now, yeah!"

No answer.

"Where could he be, un?" Deidara said. I better get back to camp. Wait, where's camp? Deidara walked around and finely gave up looking "in the dark when he was sleepy" and sat down by a tree. His eyes fluttered shut and he drifted off to sleep.

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It felt like he had only been sleeping for three seconds when he woke up to a lowed yelling in his ear. "Deidara senpai wake-up." Deidara reluctantly got up and glared at Tobi.

"Tobi, you ass! I was looking for you all night, un!"

"Tobi was looking for you, but he felt sleepy and lad down!"

"Let's pack up camp and get going, un. Before I decide to kill you, yeah."

"Ok, senpai, Tobi knows how he can have a catfish and a dogfish now. All Tobi has to do is get a leash for the dogfish!" Tobi said with excitement in his words.

Deidara grunted and started to pack "turns out he wasn't that far from the camp."

They started to head off, and Deidara thought that Tobi might not talk for once. Of course, right when he was thinking about it Tobi was blabbering on "like a chattering hog-monkey" about how candy canes are for ginger- bread-men with one leg "get it! Like a cane, but made out of candy! Not my greatest idea."

This was going to be a long day.


End file.
